I've moved! You can find my new blog at EricMartindale.com.

Remaeus' shared items

Thursday, February 14, 2008

I've Moved!

Just to let everyone know, I no longer post here. I'm over at EricMartindale.com now. Direct your comments there!

Monday, February 04, 2008



me: All coders who aren't babies are from Unix (pre Windows)
Ashish: I use Notepad all the time. So easy for quick notes.
me: Notepad++ for me
I don't think I ever close it
Ashish: I assume Notepad++ is my Notepad on steroids.
me: It's notepad with tabs
And natural growth horomones
Ashish: oooo tabs.
me: With a couple implants, too
Ashish: That sounds sexy.
me: The sexy derives from the implants, actually
Sent at 12:58 PM on Monday

Thursday, January 24, 2008

When Girls Don't Put Out

Ladies, have a sense of humor and don't rake me over the coals about this. Story came from a chain letter that was floating around.

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.

Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't feel like
it, I just want you to hold me."

I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!"

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...

"You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for each outfit."

We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.

I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier."

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, "WHAT?"

I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that bitch knows I'm smarter than her.

Monday, October 29, 2007

Douche Parking Job by Nissan 350Z; Leaving a note for them

Nicole Lee writes, "...while I understand that all people have their moments, the above photo is what gets to me. People who don
’t care about anyone at all, or are so absorbed in their own worlds that they forget that other people, and other people’s property exists as well. So, I left a friendly reminder..."

Oh yes, Cole. This is golden.

This has been done before, but it is NONETHELESS a very loser-ish thing to do. It truly is not that difficult to put the car in reverse and give it another shot - you are NOT beautiful and unique snowflake. No matter how awesome your car is.

There is no excuse for this douchbaggery. You should've done more.

read more | digg story


Cole looks like she got a resolution!



Score, darling. Score.

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

What A Friend Said About Me.

Just caught this over a MySpace (gasp!) bulletin. Actually, I'm lying, Shannon called me when she posted this to make sure I saw it. Because you know I wouldn't have.
Girls - pick the first guy on your top friends.
Unless their family than pick the next one.
Guys - do the same, but the first girl .

- Don't change it
- Enter their name
- Be honest
- Repost this so your friends can do it too

1. Who is it?

2. How did you meet?
6th grade, baby. We go back.

3. If you were crying would this person cheer you up?

4. Where is this person?

5. Have you ever spent the night with this person?
I've crashed at his place. But not with him. We don't roll like that, s0n.

6. Will this person repost this?
Lol, Never.

7. Is this person family?
Yup. Always will be part of it.

8. Do you trust this person ?
Uh Hu. He knows me better than anyone.

9. If you could change something about them, would you?
Nope. Well, I'd make it so he called more often. But we're both so damn busy.

10. Does this person live close to you?
5 minutes away.

11. How much does this person know about you?
TOO much...=). Just kidding.

12. What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator with this person?
We'd probably do stuipd shit so the people monitoring the elevator cameras
would be laughing their asses off. And then I'd probably be fussing him out, saying this was all his fault and he'd just sit there trying to take apart the damn elevator keypad and claim it was something he's always wanted to do. What a retard... ;)

13. Do you argue with this person?
God yes. And we fight. I'm Talking an all out BRAWL. ;)

14. If you guys went to jail together, what would it be for?
Running from the cops. Hacking into some top secret government website. Aiding and Ebedding. TRYING to get into Lake Royal. ha...

15. Do you want to see this person right now?
Sometime soon, Yeah. I miss him =(

"MY TOP BOY"- if you're a girl and "MY TOP GIRL"-if your a guy

I love you too, Shannon. You're... mostly correct. On which parts... I'm not at liberty to disclose. :D